- Locate bison.
- Shoot bison in ass with tranquilizer dart.
- Take blood samples and attach collar, all while watching for curious four-legged passers-by.
- Inject bison with wake-up juice.
- Self-reliance. Ain't nobody going to help you in the case of mechanical failure or repeated gorings. It's just you and your hand-picked team of stone-cold, hard-core, devil-may-care wildlife biologists against 1500 pounds of groggy bovine.
- Development of dart gun sniper skills. Now that I think about it, the combination of cross-country skiing and precision shooting might appeal to Lisa's Finnish heritage.
Note to self: book non-refundable winter travel tickets and investigate dart gun license requirements.
- Having The Handbook of Wildlife Chemical Immobilization on your bookshelf and not having to explain it. I love obscure how-to literature.
- SCIENCE! Come on, what is biology if not poking and prodding large wild animals? Put your microscopes away, kids; we're going to learn something even if it kills us by goring and trampling.
- Clarity of purpose: shoot bison in ass, do science, run away. That's the best reason to get out of bed this side of averting alligator attacks.
1 Stolen from this article on a Parks Canada wildlife veterinarian. Read it in French if you prefer.